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misallianceGetting married to a much older man woman might have to deal with a man who could be: first, a Lovelace who has a baggage of failed marriages, second, an inveterate bachelor who is scared to grow old alone and finally, a mature man with middle life crises who is trying to stay relevant. Marriage with any of these men has its advantages and disadvantages.

1. Lovelace. This type of men has a way with women. However you should not be alarmed as all his previous women have sort of worked on it and trained him. He knows how to please a woman, what to give her as a present: why fur coat is better then an iron. He realizes that he should call home if he is running late so his wife wouldn’t worry. He knows how to behave if his wife is depressed or in bad mood as he has already been there and done that. One of his ex was a good cook, other did laundry very well, third was funny. He is spoilt and expects his new young wife to have all these merits, to be a superwoman.

2. Hardened bachelor. There are men who at the age of 40-45 are still single. At some point he realizes that he should get a wife who will look after him when he is old. This type of men is willing to assume the responsibility and create a family. He looks at himself and thinks: I have a house, job, financial stability, so now I want to have children to continue my line. What is good about this man? Apart from high social status he has another important advantage – he is an ideal father because he is ready for it. He does not need self-affirmation in family arguments because he is wise and serious enough to find a positive outcome in any situation.

3. Middle life crises. A man has been married to his contemporary for twenty years then suddenly he’s got middle life crises. He meets a young woman and passionately madly falls in love with her. Prior to marriage comes a passionate love affair, double life and then a painful divorce with his first wife. The ‘other’ women that get married to stolen husbands in 80% cases get disappointed with the marriage. One thing is to meet twice a week and it is completely different to live everyday life with this man. Often a young wife, after she’s gotten what she wanted, breaking the previous marriage and forcing him to marry her, ends up with nothing like she expected. She takes off her high heels, gets pregnant and spends most of the day barefoot cooking. Her husband lives the same life as in previous marriage.

Looking for a father of your children

That marriage is built according to the following model: man is in charge, woman is a junior. Man has more life experience and strength while woman is a small weak creature. Such roles model provides woman with a feeling of comfort and security. Man is wiser and more experienced then she is. He can play a role of Pygmalion creating his woman. He is always very interesting. Very often woman in that kind of marriage is surrounded by affection, care and attention of her husband. She is being spoilt like a child. Men of 50-60 years are often very romantic, staying married he still courts his wife, taking her to the theater, enriching her spiritually and emotionally which is not always the case with a man who is coeval with a woman. A woman will never betray such man. She might have a brief affair with her fitness trainer but she will never leave her mature husband.

The other side of the medal

Mature age has some certain problems related to deteriorating health and aging of husband. To be married to a mature man, woman must have lots of compassion, tact and patience for her husband. After couple months of living together she must remember that certain food can cause her husband heartburn or be able to anticipate his rheumatism or diabetic complications.

Marrying a mature man woman must understand that apart from being a perfect housewife she will have to become his doctor: to make sure her husband takes vitamins regularly, eat healthy, exercises, has rest as well as be able to check his blood pressure. Man can be picky telling her that she is doing everything wrong. He likes certain things to be the way he is used to. Never try to change him or his habits. You should take his “little peculiarities” as a given especially if he used to live alone before and got used to certain way of life.

Mature husband is afraid his wife might leave him for a younger man. He is afraid that he is being loved “for convenience”: for his high social status and financial stability. If a man leaves his first wife for a younger one he feels guilty for it before his children and the first wife of 20 years. In general this marriage can have lots of problems and issues. Some women have to deal with husband’s erection problems, others with his rheumatism or jealousy. Nevertheless young women still find mature men attractive because they can be supportive, intelligent, romantic and spiritual which younger men usually lack.

Other articles:

How to start living together

Some ideas for a romantic date

Amenities of Bachelorhood

What is the best way to choose a man?

 
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